last night i had one of the most ironic conversations. it involved an idea for the most brilliant verizon commerical which involves pie and the realization that it was indeed pi day. but i can't tell you the idea because...well... it's not copyrighted yet ;]. my hopes is that by the next pi day phil and i will be debt free, hahaha. i'll let you know when the commerical airs. who knows, maybe i have a future in advertising.

tonight was a wonderful night at youth group. i think the frustration there at the end helped me realize just how awesome it was. and it wasn't that much happened, very little happened actually. phil decided that we'd just take the evening to hang out and relax and give those who just recently lost their friend to cancer to discuss it. it gave us time to futher relationships and to plainly be silly for a while, like the family that we are.

i've been burdened lately with something that i think is pretty huge on God's heart: holiness. that may sound totally cliche but when you get down to it it's vital. it took me a bit to realize that God's been slapping me in the face with it. "take your shoes off" has been a repeated phrase throughout my week. i first heard it used in the sermon at nags head church last sunday. we're going through the book of moses [and it's the same sermon series i'm creating paintings for]. the passage was on moses and God where God speaks to moses through the burning bush. He tells moses to take off his sandals because he is standing on holy ground and then rick dove into what it means to be holy.

now as a bible college student as well as a believer the definition of holiness is something you hear a lot but for me its been a while since i've just sat and tried to figure out what it really means [for me]. "being set apart" is what we're told but because i live IN the world a lot of the times its hard to see the tiniest ways i can set myself apart without being obnoxious about it.

one of the decisions that kept me from pursuing joining the church plant team to nashville was that i have emotional and spiritual baggage. in my notes from the NHC sermon i wrote, "God doesn't care about the baggage... He wants you to take off your shoes! You are living a new life!" God worked it out to where i could have a sit down conversation with an area chrsitian counselor because i realized that the baggage was getting in the way. while i was mulling over this whole holiness business i realized that God is making it extremely clear its time to let go of my past, to live this "new life" and to "set my self apart."

i was also reminded that the "heros" of the bible were screw ups just like me. that definatly helps in letting some of this baggage go. to know that God still loves me and is proud of me inspite of the mistakes i make and have made. "holiness doesn't mean being perfect, the church fathers weren't perfect."

this past wednesday it was my turn to give the devotion at our monthly obxymn meeting. my fellow youth ministry friends sat before my devo discussing their frustrations with those who live shallow faith and also with denominations/divisions. when they finally looked at me to give the devotion i couldn't help but chuckle and say, well...this goes right along with what i was going to share from the Bible. Isaiah 58. in a nut shell the passage starts out saying how there's all these people who appear to be true blue followers but yet they're like "white washed tombs" to quote jesus. God then says the real ways you should live or setting yourself apart.

everywhere i turn i feel Gods heart pleading me to live holy.

whether or not that made much sense, it's a piece of my brain that's desiring to be shared. so there you have it. a look into my head. scary i know.

"You crossed the great divide
you took our place
You offered up your life
though we had failed
the veil was torn and loved remained
you are holy lord

distraction cast aside
we seek your face
we offer up our lives
to bring you praise
a love the walls cannot contain
you are holy lord

we're risin' up in
spirit and in truth
a living sacrifice
we worship you
a people undivided
lord hear us sing
we are yours
and you are our king

this is our love
hearts joined as one
desperate for all you are
lord break down these walls
and see how we run
desperate for all you want
we chase your heart

we didnt come to leave here entertained
or worship under any other name
we're cryin' out for you alone
you are holy lord

Show us the way to your heart

we've found our voice
we've found our cause
we're on our knees
the carpets worn
as we join our hearts
with distant shores
and sing to you lord"

--hillsong